i smell a rat. i think someone's gonna assassinate me. my assassination's probably gonna be next week or the week after.

goodness..

i'm gonna go get bullet-proof vests.

will it be a long-distance kill with a sniper rifle?

or up-close-and-personal kind like stabbing?

me being from ntu. i think i'll be stabbed.

oh boy.

shit. i hate being pushed.

it's bad enough work sucks.

it sucks even more when life outside of work means i still get pushed around with deadlines.

i find it quite difficult to type out some decent posts these couple of months. maybe 2009 isnt a good year for blogging just looking at the post counts for any month this year and they are all single digits.

i guess i'm quite filled with anger and a lot of stuff.

maybe i should write on that.

so where shall we start?

my work?

i have nothing against my work, except the colleague of mine. quite an irritating bitch i tell you.

and yet all of a sudden i've decided not to talk about her. since she's gonna be leaving by the end of this month. i'll just put up with her nonsense for another week.

got my exam results back. expected the kind of grades i got. as mentioned in one of the previous posts: i did study hard, but it's just bad luck that the modules i had for 2nd semester is a lot tougher.

failed physics. expected. got an F. was actually hoping that even though i failed, i wouldnt fail so badly (getting an F) so dont have to re-do that module again.

this sucks.

i'm gonna be doing that module again next semester.

hmm..

i seem easily irritated these few weeks.

maybe it's the results.

i just dont feel like doing anything anymore.

no i dont want to go out.

but then again...

=====

the girl read on newspapers that some people who are depressed likes to cut themselves. she hasnt got the courage to try. as usual, the fear of pain.

she constantly wondered why is everyone so condescending towards her?

she knows she has a bad enough temper, but that doesnt warrant the kind of response on her. and unfortunately,she's not getting any response from her friends.

they shun her.

somehow it just added on to her depression.

everything adds up to her depression...

and as mentioned in previous post, she has actually died already.

she's dead.

jumped off a building.

why didnt her friends do anything beforehand to stop such tragedy from happening?
maybe they arent her friends, just pretending to be her friends.

we didnt do much to help her.
"i didnt to much to help too."

and the sad thing is that people only noticed her death after the stench from her rotting body got worse.

we are no better than animals.

her friends let her die even though everyone knew that she was mentally unstable.

animals.

=====

well, was watching some disney movie on tv just now. saw this scene where everyone was dancing in a ball.

reminds me how a few weeks ago the girlfriend wanted to teach me ballroom dancing. but the clumsy me. lol. two left feet? or is two right feet?

i kept stepping on her. either that or i kept tripping over myself. have to admire her patience. i gave up 10min later.

goodness.

i shouldnt dance.

fanny showed me one of her friend's blog today. the way she described it. sounds so explicit and sexual. turns out it's nothing much. perhaps it's because i'm older and have seen such nonsense before.

but oh well.

but i have to admit i like her friend's style of writing. pretty cool and interesting.

work sucks today.